


The Black Arrow Inn

by inheritanceofgeek



Series: New Year's Eve at the Black Arrow Inn [1]
Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types, The Lord of the Rings - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Bars and Pubs, Christmas Shopping, F/M, Flirting, Galadriel is a Little Shit, Gandalf Is a Little Shit, Hot Single Bisexual Dads in Love, Idiots in Love, M/M, Pensioners can say what they like aparently, embarrassing dads
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-31
Updated: 2015-12-31
Packaged: 2018-05-10 16:14:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,413
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5592775
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/inheritanceofgeek/pseuds/inheritanceofgeek
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>As much as Legolas loves his father, there is only so much he take of him at one time. Especially when out christmas shopping.</p><p>So when he comes across The Black Arrow Inn and its "Day Care Centre" (Standard package: One Pint, Deluxe Package: Double Whiskey) he decides to deposit Thranduil there to give him a moments peace. Thranduil is reluctant to comply until a certain attractive Innkeeper shows up. </p><p>Featuring cheeky pensioners, young people who won't admit their feelings and middle-aged flirting.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Black Arrow Inn

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by a sign advertising a Husband Day Care Centre youarebeingshaggedbyarareparrot saw whilst walking in Edinburgh. 
> 
> I hope you enjoy!

The Welsh town of Dale was famous for having the most number of independent stores per square mile, with not a Starbucks or Primark in sight. As such, it was considered  _ the  _ place for the rich and pompous to purchase their wares. No true Hipster was complete without a scarf from  _ Otrib Fashion Boutique _ and a selfie in  _ Café De La Ri.  _ Ellenath Greenleaf was a big believer in buying unique gifts for her friends and family and there was nowhere better for it than Dale. The town was a miss-mash of cultures and couture. You could purchase a delicate golden threaded sari in  _ Dale of New Delhi _ , before travelling next door to buy the latest gadgets and gizmos at Istrai Inc.; before crossing the road to order a traditional hand carved wooden dressing table from Firienholt. 

Thus, it had become a tradition for their family to make the commute from Surrey to Wales in order to buy whatever trinket caught their fancy. After her death, her husband and son had kept up the tradition in order to keep her with them during the festive season. However, at age 25, being forced to spend four hours in a car with his Stern Faced Drama Queen Father; and then a further ten carrying gradually heavier and heavier bags through crowded streets, was starting to grate a little.

Legolas loved his Father, he really did. But Thranduil Oropherion-Greenleaf was something best experienced in small doses. And with some sort of alcohol at hand.  “Ada, please, can you for once not haggle with the market stallholders?”

“Legolas, one must always haggle when shopping in a market. It is simply how these things are done.”

“Not when you bellow and shout like that.”

“He was refusing to back down.”

“Then just walk away!”

“Oropherions don’t give up, Legolas!”

“Well then I’m glad I took Naneth’s name.” Mumbled Legolas, shifting his packages further in his arms because, of course, his Father could not carry any of them himself! That would be barbaric! They’d finally bought all of the gifts for their family and Thranduil’s work colleagues, and it was just personal gifts for Legolas’ friends that were left. If only he could be rid of his father for the next hour, he might actually be able to enjoy this trip to his favourite town for once…

That’s when he saw the sign.

The Black Arrow Inn

Dale’s Oldest Husband* Day Care Centre

\-------Established 1516-------

Need time to yourself?

Need Time to Relax?

Want to Go Shopping?

Leave your Husband with us!

Standard Package: One Pint

Deluxe Package: Double Whisky

*Caters to Parents, Wives, Partners and Siblings also.

It was painted in neat calligraphy on a blackboard outside a pub he hadn’t recognised at first. The Black Arrow had been a staple of Esgaraoth High Street for almost as long as could remember, but it had always been boarded up- a burnt out black shell of a place, a victim of the great fire of 2005. However, now the doors were open, the sign above the door polished to perfection. It looked like the perfect example of a Traditional Independent British Pub-- something so rare to see these days.

“Legolas, why have we stopped?” frowned his father “You said you wanted to get presents for your little club mates, yes?”

“Yes…” said Legolas thoughtfully, “Ada, I’ve had an idea! Considering it’s just my friends we need to get presents for, why don’t you wait here for me, and I’ll return once I’m done? You can watch the bags. Your feet must be aching by now.”

Thranduil’s frowned deepened and he examined the pub skeptically “I don’t think that a wise idea, Son, this place doesn’t seem to be exactly, reputable.”

Legolas resisted the urge to roll his eyes at his Father’s snobbery. “You haven’t even looked inside yet, Ada. Let’s, let’s just go in and see how you feel?” And without further ado he pushed open the door and staggered inside the pub, his Father following him with a slightly baffled expression.

The inside displayed an element of class that Legolas had not been expecting from the exterior. There were smooth leather armchairs scattered about around hand carved mahogany tables. Large windows gave it plenty of light, creating a calm atmosphere. An Enya track could just be heard above the pleasant buzz of conversation. The pub was just full enough to be busy without the clamour and cry of crowds. Legolas marched straight up to the empty bar, placing his bags on the floor and swinging himself up into a stool, his Father following suit.

“What can I get you lads?” asked the barmaid, coming over. She was a pretty blonde girl, slightly younger than Legolas but with an air about her that indicted she’d had to shoulder significant responsibility from an early age.

“Lime soda for me,” smiled Legolas, “and my Father will have a large glass of red wine.”

Thranduil raised a fine eyebrow “I will?”

“Sure thing.” Smiled the girl, pulling down glasses from above the bar “What kind you looking for? I can recommend the Rivendell if you’re looking for something light, but the Dorwinion is great if you’re looking for something richer.”

“You serve Dorwinion?” asked Thranduil in surprise, and Legolas heaved a sigh of relief at having found what must be the only pub in existence to serve his Father’s favourite wine.

“Aye, only the best at the Black Arrow, Da’s just bringing over the new stock now.” She nodded towards a side door where three figures were bringing through large wooden barrels. The first through the door was a young lad of about sixteen, struggling with the heavy weight of it but looking determined to carry it over himself. Behind him was a broad shouldered yet short blonde man with a full beard, carrying a barrel under each arm as if they weighed no more than a packet of sugar. He was chuckling at the lad, who snapped back at him with a sharp

“I told you Fí, I can do it myself!”

The last man to walk through the door had the wonderful effect of making his father’s face drop, forming an expression Legolas had only seen on his face whenever Pierce Brosnan appeared on screen. He was tall, slightly tanned with strong arms, long brown hair and a scruffy beard.  _ Thank the lord for Attractive Innkeepers! _ Thought Legolas

“He’ll have a glass of the Dorwinion.” Smiled Legolas, handing over a twenty and rising his eyebrows as he received a ten back in change. He’d have to come back here more often, if prices were this reasonable—Dorwinion Wine was expensive, after all. It’s why so few places stocked it.

The girl must have seen the look in his eyes though as she replied “Da’s got a deal with the supplier, owed him a favour from years back. Finally pulling through.” She chuckled. Legolas nodded absentmindedly and shoved the change back into his wallet, taking a sip of his drink.

“Da, do you want a hand with that?” the girl called over, walking round the side of the bar “I’ll get you your drink in a minute Love.” she smiled, rushing to help the lad, who had to be her brother, before he dropped the Barrel on his foot.

“I’m alright Sigrid love, Fíli’s done most of the heavy lifting already. The empty barrels need putting on the van though, if you don’t mind sorting that out for me, Cariad?”

“Sure thing.” She smiled “Gentlemen at the bar wants a glass of Dorwinion, could you serve him for me? He’s already paid.”

“Aye, no problem love.” He nodded, helping the lads set the barrels down beside the counter.

“Alright Bain, upstairs to finish your homework.”

“But Daaaaaa, can’t I stay and help a little longer? It’s almost the holidays!”

“Exactly,  _ almost _ . You’ve got three weeks of nothing coming up, now scoot back upstairs. Why you’re so eager to help out lifting barrels I’ll never know though.”

“Because it’s so much cooler down here Da!”

“Take your word for it.” He chuckled, turning the boy around and shoving him towards the staff door that no doubt lead upstairs to the apartment above.

The blonde set down his own barrels and shoved his long hair back behind his ears “I’ll um, go see if Sigrid needs a hand with anything.”

“Of course you will Fíli, of course you will.” Said the man, rolling his eyes as the boy all but jogged after her. “Fantastic worker that boy, great lad to have around but the sooner he gets up the courage to ask her out the better.” He smiled at Thranduil, coming over to sort out their order.

“Is it usual for a Father to wish an employee to ask out his daughter? I thought that kind of behaviour was frowned upon in general?”

“True, but I’ve had one too many dropped glass because of his cow eyes. Plus the next girl to ask him out will end up with a broken nose if Sigrid has anything to do with it. Nobody’s told the tourists yet that even though the blonde’s single, he’s spoken for. It’s best for all our interests they finally work up the courage to ask each other out. Dorwinion wine, yeah?” He asked, lifting up a barrel and slotting it into place with ease.

“Please.” Smiled Thranduil, licking his lips slightly. Legolas grinned to himself. His plan to be rid of him was going better than expected.

“So, you okay if I leave you here for a bit? I’ll drive back, so don’t worry about staying sober.”

“Yes, sure thing.” Said Thranduil absently

“I’ll leave the bags here with you.”

“Yes, okay Son.”

Legolas chuckled to himself as he downed his drink and headed back out, leaving his Da to his flirting. With any luck by the time he got back, his Da would be drunk enough to just sleep throughout the journey home and Legolas could listen to his audiobook in peace. He needed gifts for the whole of their D&D Fellowship, plus Aragorn’s girlfriend, no, wife – Arwen was his wife now. Fuck he’d have to get used to that. He also still needed to get something for his best friend Tauriel, who was famously impossible to buy for. After all, what did you get the teetotal Vegan Ninja, who’s sole passion in life was her viola? 

“So, this place hasn’t been in business in over ten years, I thought you’d shut down completely.” Said Thranduil, smiling at his entirely too delicious barman.

“Aye,  we were for a long while there. The court case only closed up this year. Got burnt down in an Arson attack by a land developer, name of Smaug.” He explained at Thranduil’s blank expression. “It was in all the papers here. Man tried to convince my Da to sell but he knew better than to give up on the family business. So, he tried to run us out of town. We’ve been sitting on it till we could prove what he’d done. Finally got him behind bars and the insurance company paid up properly. We had our grand opening six months back.”

“It looks good.” Thranduil smiled, his eyes not leaving his server “I’m Thranduil, by the way, Thranduil Oropherion-Greenleaf.” Even when flirting, he never removed Ellenath’s surname from his own. She was still a part of who he was, and he would not sacrifice that for anyone. No matter how ridiculously attractive.

“Bard Bowman.” He grinned

“Get yourself something to drink, Bard. My treat.” He smiled,

“Not when I’m working I’m afraid.” And Thranduil noticed that his thumb rubbed absentmindedly at a wedding ring round his finger. Damn. He was usually so good at telling these things. Still, it wasn’t technically his ring finger....

“Your spouse wouldn’t approve of you drinking with customers?”

“Ah, well. Kendra’s, Kendra’s not with us anymore.” He glancing sideways at the wall behind him, where a series of black and white photos were on display.

“How long ago?” smiled Thranduil sadly

“About seven years.” He sniffed, grabbing a cloth from behind the bar and scrubbing at an invisible spot

“My Ellen died ten years ago. Time doesn’t make things any easier.”

“No, it doesn’t.” agreed Bard, stopping his polishing to look more closely at Thranduil “So what brings a southerner like yourself up here to Dale?”

“Christmas Shopping. It’s tradition. We like to come here to admire the goods and services on offer.”

“Ah, you’re one of those families. Well, you’re more than welcome. Keep the local economy a float you do, which means you keep me in business too.”

“Popular amongst the locals are you?”

“Oh aye we do quite well. You know when Bofur’s made a big sale because he’ll be in drinking away his profits.”

“Close knit community then?”

“It’s a small town. You don’t get a lot of choice. Not like you big city types.”

“There is a certain privacy granted from a city that one misses from a small town, it’s true. I grew up in a village in Surrey. Everyone in everyone else’s pockets. Made it hard to meet any new people, for new experiences, new adventures.” He took a careful sip of his wine

Bard looked slightly taken aback at the man. He was utterly beautiful in a way that men normally weren’t. Oh sure, Bard was a card carrying Bisexual, but that didn’t mean that this man didn’t stick out like a supernova in the night sky. His hair was pale blonde, almost silver and held back in a tight ponytail. His eyes were ice blue and sharp as anything. His gaze felt like it went right through him, his wondering eyes making Bard feel naked. Men like this didn’t usually go for men like him. Yet here he was, being chatted up in his own bar by the kind of man that simply didn’t exist outside of fairy tales.  _ Well, _ thought Bard  _ two can play at that game _

“Oh sure, it can be difficult to find new people, but you never know when fate will bring a handsome stranger into your life, do you?”

“Funny how that works, isn’t it?” smiled the man, finishing off his wine in one large gulp and delicately licking his lips with his eyes fixed on Bard

“Funny’s not the word I’d use.” He grinned ruefully “Lucky, maybe? Perhaps Fortuitous?”

“So do you consider yourself a lucky man, Mr Bowman?” smiled the man, tapping his glass in request for a re-fill

“Not usually, but I suspect my luck may be about to change.” He took Thranduil’s glass and refilled it, sliding it across to him. His fingers lingered on the glass long enough for Thranduil to lightly drag across them. Sure, Bard’s flirting skills might be a little rusty, but he was considered quite the Dog in his youth. Indeed, Thranduil’s hungry gaze told him that he dis still have it. Not bad for a forty-five-year-old Single Father of Three.

“Only if you play your cards right, Mr Bowman. Though I have every confidence in your abilities in that matter.”

Sigrid came out from the back, dusting down her clothes and looked around to see if anyone was waiting at the bar to be served. The only person there was the posh bloke from earlier who seemed wrapped in conversation with her Da. He leant forward to whisper something in his ear and gave her Da a devious smile.

“I see your dad’s made a new friend.” Said Fíli, leaning against the wall and surveying the scene.

“He has indeed.” Mused Sigrid, biting her lip. Normally she was against flirting with customers, sure employees did it to get better tips, but Sigrid liked to keep an element of decency to the profession. Still, it had been a long time since Da had had anyone to flirt with, it would do him good to get a bit of practice in. She was glad her brother wasn’t around though, she wasn’t sure what Bain would make of seeing their father chatting up a stranger in the middle of the day…

“Are you going to step in?”

“No, I don’t think so.” She smiled Ruefully “I think Da can handle himself.”

Fíli grinned at her “I was hoping you’d say that. Bard deserves someone to look at him like that.”

“He does yeah.” She murmured “Hey Fíli” she said suddenly turning to him “what are you doing later?”

“Kí and me are playing a gig at the Prancing Pony, why’d you ask?” there was a note of hopefulness in his voice that Sigrid somehow failed to notice

“Oh, no reason just, wondered if you were free is all. It’s my night off and I’ve no plans, but you do so, that’s fine.” She coughed “Prancing Pony, that’s the Gay Bar that just opened, right?” she asked quickly, attempting to recover

“Yeah. They’re having a Celtic Night. You’re welcome to come along, if, if you want?”

“Yeah, I might pop over later.” She smiled

“Great. We’re on at eight. It’d be good to see you. I’d like, I mean, we’d like to see you there. You’re our good luck charm.”

“Wouldn’t miss it then. That’s what friends are for, after all?”

“Yeah. Friends.” Said Fíli his face dropping and his smile becoming slightly fixed. “Oh look! Customers!” he said suddenly as an elderly couple wondered over to the bar “I’ll go and just” and he dashed away to greet them, and hopefully distract them from the show her Da and his New Friend were putting on together.

“Ah, to be young and in love.” Chuckled Gandalf from his usual spot in the corner

“I’ve no idea what you’re on about, Gandalf.” She said primly

“No, I don’t suppose you do.” Mused Galadriel, his so called ‘If-I-were-Heterosexual-Life-Partner’, sipping on her white-wine spritzer “It’s what makes it all the more interesting to watch.”

“You two better be the ones to watch it.” She grumbled,

“It’s the right of the old to observe the actions of the young and laugh about it.” scolded Galadirel

“The lady is correct, Miss Bowman. Allow us our sentimentality over your sentimentally.” The pair of them exchanged smirks and Sigrid rolled her eyes as she grabbed a tray from the side to clear away the empty glasses

“You two need to stop talking in riddles.”

“You need to stop thinking there are riddles to begin with.” Smiled Galadriel demurely.

“Saeson.” Scoffed Sigrid as she went away.

*

It had taken a lot longer for Legolas to get gifts for everyone than he’d expected, but in the end he’d found something he was hopeful everyone would like. He’d gotten a set of steel tankards for Boromir- something that couldn’t be smashed at at one of his post-footie celebrations; a selection of organic soaps and skin care products for Aragorn to prevent the outdoors from doing anymore damage to him; some silvery bangles for Arwen which he wasn’t sure she’d actually wear but at least they looked pretty; custom pipe weed for Merry and Pippin; slippers for Frodo; a book on permaculture for Sam, and some sheet music for Tauriel that he thought she might enjoy along with some fancy and ridiculously expensive resin.

Gimli had been a lot harder to buy for. He considered getting him tankards like Boromir’s but didn’t like the idea of getting them the same thing. He’d looked long and hard at the books on civil engineering, but figured he already knew everything there was no know about concrete, so what use would he have for them? He never wore jewellery, would murder him if he bought him soap, would never use candles, and whisky, no matter how fine, was far too impersonal a gift. Eventually though, right at the end of the High Street, he’d found the perfect shop.

Moria seemed to sell anything to do with stone. Stone carvings, stone furniture, stone jewellery and had a wonderful collection of semi-precious stones he knew Gimli would just love! Onyx, Agate, Jasper, Malachite – in every colour, shape and size imaginable. He’d no idea which he’d like the most, so in the end he’d just bought one of every colour and hoped it would do.

“Your boyfriend a Geologist then?” asked the man at the counter, as he placed them neatly inside a box for him

“Boyfriend? Oh no, Gimli’s a friend. Just a friend.”

“Awful lot to spend on a friend, Laddie.” He’d smiled knowingly

“Not really.” Sniffed Legolas. It was the most he’d spent out of everyone, but if Gimli loved it as much as he thought he might – surely it was worth it? And they were just friends. Everyone knew they were just friends. They’d been friends for ages and there was nothing but friendship between them. Because they were friends.

“Whatever you say, Laddie. Not my place to speculate.” He smiled and handed over the box. “I hope your  _ friend _ likes them _. _ ”

“I’m sure he will.” he snapped, as he struggled down the road and back to the pub where his Father was hopefully snoozing against the bar.

Oh how wrong he’d been. Legolas simply didn’t seem to be that good a judge of his Father’s tolerance for wine, and he was now laughing in the corner with an elderly couple, who seemed to be a couple of glasses passed sober themselves. His bags had been thrown onto an empty chair and Legolas really hoped that nothing had been damaged.

“My son! My little leaf! Leggy-peggy!” he waved over and Legolas groaned.

“Hello Ada, I see you’re making friends.”

“Yes! Some very good friends indeed. Lots of very beautiful people here in Dale. We’ll have to come back next year!”

“We always come here Father, since I was a baby.”

“Yes but next year next year!”

Legolas blinked at him “Next Christmas?”

“Noooooo, we always come here for Christmas, ever since you were a baby! Don’t you remember?”

“Yes Ada, I just said that.”

“’Course you did, ‘course you did.” He attempted to tap his nose and missed, prodding himself in the eye instead.

“What your father means,” said a serene looking woman sitting beside him, who for all the world could look sober if it weren’t for empty bottle of wine she was clutching in her hand “That you need to come back for New Year’s Eve.”

“It’s the best party in town. The best party anywhere!” chuckled the man next to her “Your father would love it! You should come too. Dale needs some new blood running through it, instead of all us old fogeys.”

“Speak for yourself, Mithrandir.”

“My Lady, you do not look a day over forty I assure you, but the birth certificate tells a different story.”

“You should be more polite to your elders.” She scoffed

“As my lady wishes.” He bowed his head and Legolas did his best to keep a pleasant smile.

“You really should come.” Said a sober voice from behind him, and Legolas turned to see the barmaid from earlier. “It’s our first New Year’s Eve since re-opening, and it’d be great to see as many people here as possible. We’ve beds upstairs if you need somewhere to stay. Plus, I think my da would enjoy spending some more time with your da.” Her eyes twinkled mischievously

“Her dad is really really hot Legolas. Really hot.” Said Thranduil in a stage whisper.

“I’m sure he is, Ada. Come on.” He sighed “Best to get you to the car.”

“So I’ll see you at New Year’s?” asked the girl, hopefully

Legolas frowned “I’m gay.” He said flatly

“Good because you’re not my type. I don’t go for pretty boys who assume that all invitations are given out in order to get a leg over.”

“She likes her blondes short, stocky and who can play the Bodhrán.” Grinned the woman, and she and Mithrandir burst into fits of giggles.

The girl gave a long-suffering sigh “Ignore them. Just, think about it okay? You can bring your friends along? Most of the students from Arda go home for the holidays, so it’s a bit dead.”

“Fíli doesn’t go home.” Giggled Mithrandir and Sigrid threw him a glare that could pierce dragonhide.

“Don’t leave me alone with these two. Please?”

“I’ll think about it.” Smiled Legolas, lifting his father to his feet and draping his arm around his neck “Come on Ada, time to get you home.”

“Goodbye everyone.” Waved Thranduil serenely “It’s been a pleasure making your acquaintance. Especially yours.” He winked at the barman who winked back. Legolas wasn’t sure how he felt about that, nor was he sure how he felt about not being sure. It was all a bit too complicated to process right now when his father was dragging him down to the floor. However, in his gut, he thought that it might just be a good thing.

*

“How was Dale? Get everything you want?” asked Aragorn, as they set up their table for their weekly D&D session.

“Oooh! Were you in Dale?” smiled Arwen, taking a seat next to him. Since getting married the pair seemed joined at the hip “My Granny lives out there. We used to visit her every summer when Mum was still alive. It’s the perfect place for Christmas shopping.”

“My mother used to take us there to do our shopping every year. So now we regularly go every year to keep her close.” Explained Legolas

“I heard the Black Arrow’s been reopened at last, is that true?”

“Yes, I actually left Father there whilst I finished up the shopping, he had, shall we say, a fun time?”

“You left Thrandy alone in a Pub?” laughed Gimli “That’s got to be one of the biggest mistakes of your life.”

“He does have a knack for making friends. We got invited to a New Year’s Eve party there, actually.”

“A party? When, where and who with?” cried Boromir, helping Frodo bring snacks into the living room of the flat he, Sam, Pippin and Merry all shared.

“Dale. It’s in wales. It’s very far away and probably not worth it.”

“Dale! I’ve always wanted to go!” he shouted excitedly “We have to go. We never do anything for New Years together.”

“That’s because you’re always off with your Football Team.”

“Because you, Elf, never do anything! What are your plans for this year?”

“Night in with Tauriel. Watch the fireworks on the television.”

“See, no fun at all! What say you guys, shall we go up to Dale to celebrate the New Year?”

“Sounds like fun.” Smiled Aragorn, wrapping an arm around Arwen’s waist “It’ll be nice to do something proper for a change.”

“Aye.” Agreed Gimli “My family lives up there anyway, Dad was talking about visiting them over Christmas.”

“Can I bring my Uncle?” mused Frodo, “He’s been acting odd recently”

“Odder than normal?” asked Merry, quirking an eyebrow

“And you think a party will sort Old Bilbo out?” frowned Sam

“Well, it wouldn’t hurt.” smiled Pippin “And Old Bilbo’s great at parties! He was always brilliant at Family Reunions. He’d get drunk and tell the most amazing stories.”

“I swear those are never true Pip.” Said Merry rolling his eyes

“Bet you a fiver they are!”

“You bet me a fiver, that Old Bilbo did actually travel from Lands End to John O'groats with a Motorcycle gang? Or that he really  _ did _ break into the National Gallery to steal a painting on the orders of the Government?” 

“Exactly.” Nodded Pippin, ignoring Sam and Merry’s exasperated looks.  

“So, it seems the Fellowship will be spending New Year’s Eve in Dale!” said Boromir triumphantly

“With my father and Frodo’s uncle.” Sighed Legolas forlornly

“Cheer up,” smiled Sam “You can bring Tauriel with you.”

“Oh yes, bring Tauriel! I’ve not seen her in ages!” grinned Arwen, who had struck up a worryingly close bond with Tauriel that he suspected would only cause him trouble in the long run.

“And I can bring Fara’. He needs to get out for once in his life, and he can’t spend another New Year’s Eve with Father.” sighed Boromir

“Fine, can we just get started now?”

“Sure.” Smiled Aragorn, consulting his notes as Dungeon Master “Okay, so there’s a dragon trying to get inside the chamber you’re in, and orcs are shooting at you from all sides.”

“Why is the dragon Thomas the Tank Engine?”

“Because Skyrim.” Smiled Arwen.

It was going to be one of those nights. 

 

*

 

It was one of those gigs. 

 

Fíli and Kíli usually loved playing the gay bars. The clients were friendlier, fewer people tried to get off with them, and the pay was usually better too. The Prancing Pony was a great venue as well. Small enough for the kind of intimacy the duo fed off of, but still with excellent acoustics and a landlord who gave them free soft drinks. But Fíli found himself unable to concentrate throughout the whole night, as his eyes shifted about in search of Sigrid. She’d promised she’d show up, but it turned out to be all a lie. Whilst he tried not to let his disappointment show in his performance, he knew he hadn’t given it the attention it deserved. 

 

“What’s Up Fí?” asked Kíli as they packed up their kit after the gig. 

 

“Nothing. I’m fine. Why’d you ask?”

 

“Your game is off. You forgot to ask for requests and, quite frankly, you just didn’t commit to the Proclaimers. The  _ Proclaimers _ Fí. It’s our big closing number!”

 

“I so committed!”

 

“Your mouth said ‘Dat-la-Dat’ but your eyes said ‘boo-hoo-hoo’.” said Kíli, wagging his bow at him. Fíli rolled his eyes at his little brother

 

“You’re reading too much into everything.”

 

“No, you are. It’s because she wasn’t here, isn’t it?”

 

“No.” he lied and Kíli just gave him a patronising look “Okay, so maybe I wasn’t on top form. But not because of Sigrid.” Kíli’s continued to stare at him and Fíli shifted his weight “Okay, so maybe I was a bit... pre-occupied. She said she would come, and then she didn’t. I was… disappointed is all.”

 

“She’s got a lot of responsibilities Fí. Maybe she needed to babysit, or Bard needed her to work or Shai needed someone to bail her out of jail again, I don’t know. Anything!”

 

“She would have sent a text…”

 

“Fí, Dale has many things. A store that specilises in wigs made from Yak hair; a bakery that only sells honey cakes, and a shop for a goat farm which my brother spends a worrying amount of time in; however, a decent phone signal alludes as all.”

 

“She’s just letting me know she’s not interested. Tonight she made her point clear. It’s fine. I’m a Big Boy Kíli, I don’t need you to humour me.”

 

“She’s not uninterested in you! She’s seriously into you Bro!”

 

“Kíli, don’t.” sighed Fíli “I’m not a baby, I can handle rejection.”

 

“She’s not rejecting you!”

 

“Kí, one day you’re going to grow up and realise that rejection is a standard part of the world. I don’t need you to pretend otherwise.”

 

“I’m not pretending. I’m telling you the honest to god truth. For some unknown reason, that beautiful young girl has fallen for a man with less Game than an empty bingo hall. Yet because he’s got No Game, he can’t believe that a girl like _ her _ would be interested in him and his hairy Goat Boy arse.”

 

“There was a pep talk in there somewhere, right?”

 

“Just ask her out Fíli!” he cupped his hands around his mouth “Assssssk heeeeeeer ooooooouuuuuut!”

 

“I have to work with her, Kíli. If I did ask her out and she said no then we’d be doomed forever. It’d be really awkward and we wouldn’t even be able to be friends anymore. Probably.” he hesitated and Kíli’s teasing grin got a little wider “It’s not worth the risk. Now. You strap the gear in the back of the bike, and I’ll go talk to Butterbur about the bill.”

 

Kíli sighed as he watched his brother walk away. Sometimes he was just too good a man for his own health. Oh well, their next gig was New Year’s Eve at the Black Arrow. Maybe a decent party and a few fireworks might just provide the right romantic atmosphere for them to realise what was going on between them.

 

**Author's Note:**

> This will be part of a series I shall hopefully be posting throughout tonight in count down to New Years Eve! 
> 
> This is the set up though, so hopefully it will give you an idea of what is to come. 
> 
> The series will be posted as separate fics rather than chapters, as they should all stand out as individual stories. 
> 
> Welsh
> 
> Saeson - Englishmen
> 
> Cariad - Darling/Love/Pet


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